Angel and I eventually realized existing without ever truly living was not what we wanted for ourselves.  So we made changes – we gradually embraced all the points discussed in this article and never looked back.  If you are in the same place we once were – seeking approval from everyone for every little thing you do – please take this post to heart and start making changes today.  Life is too short not to.

1. First and foremost, you are not obligated to live up to everyone’s expectations. – Life is under no obligation to give us what we expect.  And you are under no obligation to give others what they expect.  Period.  Do things because you care.  Do things because you know it’s right.  Don’t just do things because everyone else expects you to.
2. Expectations just get in the way of great life experiences. – Don’t let expectations (especially other people’s expectations) get in your way.  Truth be told, the unexpected is often better than the expected.  Our entire lives can be described in one sentence: It didn’t go as planned, and that’s OK.
3. You don’t need others to hold your hand every step of the way. – Be willing to go alone sometimes.  You don’t need permission to grow.  Not everyone who started with you will finish with you.  And that’s OK.  (Read The Road Less Traveled.)
4. You get to learn from your mistakes without unnecessary third-party pressure. – You’re going to mess up sometimes.  But the good news is, as long as you’re listening to your intuition, you get to decide how you’re going to mess up.  Which means you get to decide how you’re going to live and what you’re going to learn along the way.
5. No one knows you better than you know yourself. – How you seem to others and how you actually are, rarely match.  Even if they get the basic gist of who you are, they’re still missing a big piece of the puzzle.  What other people think of you will rarely contain the whole truth, which is fine.  So if someone forms an opinion of you based on superficialities, then it’s up to them, not you, to reform those opinions.  Leave it to them to worry about.  You know who you are and what’s best for you.
6. Only YOU can define what’s possible for you and your life. – Some people will kill you over time if you let them; and how they’ll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases like, “Be realistic.”  When this happens, close your ears and listen to your inner voice instead.  Remember that real success in life isn’t what others see, but how you feel.  It’s living your truth and doing what makes you feel alive.
7. In the end, happiness is simply living your life your own way.– There comes a time when your back is up against the wall and you realize all you can do is say, “Screw it, I’m doing things my way!”  That’s the earth-shattering moment you stop planning for someone else’s expectations, and start making progress on what’s truly important to YOU.  That’s when you begin to live life according to your own morals and values.  That’s when you can finally be at your happiest.
8. You can best serve yourself and others by giving yourself what YOU need. – Don’t ask yourself what the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive, and pursue it at all costs.  That’s what this world needs – people like YOU who come alive.  Which means your needs matter; so don’t ignore them.  Sometimes you have to do what’s best for you and your life, not just what seems best on the surface for everyone else.
9. Rather than being confined by opinions, you get to create your own reality. – If J.K. Rowling stopped after being rejected by multiple publishers for years, there would be no Harry Potter.  If Howard Schultz gave up after being turned down by banks 200+ times, there would be no Starbucks.  If Walt Disney quit too soon after his theme park concept was trashed by 300+ investors, there would be no Disney World.  One thing is for sure: If you give too much power to the opinions of others, you will become their prisoner.  So never let someone’s opinion define your reality.  (Read Daring Greatly.)
10. You allow yourself the freedom to speak your truth. – Yes, speak your truth even if your voice shakes.  Be cordial and reasonable, of course, but don’t tread carefully on every word you say.  Push your concerns of what others might think aside.  Let the consequences of doing so unravel naturally.  What you’ll find is that most of the time no one will be offended or irritated at all.  And if they do get upset, it’s likely only because you’ve started behaving in a way that makes them feel they have less power over you.  Think about it.  Why lie?
11. The wrong people won’t be able to tamper with your standards. – Remember, failed relationships aren’t designed to encourage you to lower your standards, but to raise them and keep them up.  So while you’re out there making decisions instead of excuses, learning new things, and getting closer and closer to your goals, know that there are others out there, like me, who admire your efforts and are striving for greatness too.   Bottom line: Don’t let the wrong people bring you down.
12. The haters will have less of an effect on you. – Don’t worry about the haters, ever.  Don’t let them get to you.  They’re just upset because the truth you know contradicts the lies they live.  Period.
13. Your individuality can be openly celebrated and enjoyed. - Constantly seeking approval means you’re perpetually worried that others are forming negative judgments of you.  This steals the fun, ingenuity, and spontaneity from your life.  Flip the switch on this habit.  If you’re lucky enough to have something that makes you different from everybody else, don’t be ashamed and don’t change.  Uniqueness is priceless.  In this crazy world that’s trying to make you like everyone else, find the courage to keep being your remarkable self.  It takes a lot of courage to stand alone, but it’s worth it.  Being unapologetically YOU is worth it!
14. There will be less drama to deal with. – Forgo the drama.  Ignore the negativity around you.  Just be sincere and kind, and promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate.
15. You will have more time to socialize with the right people. –When you’re feeling insecure, you typically don’t notice the hundreds of people around you who accept you just the way you are.  All you notice are the few who don’t.  Don’t ever forget your worth.  Spend time with those who value you.  No matter how good you are to people, there will always be negative minds out there who criticize you.  Smile, ignore them, and carry on.  You might feel unwanted and unworthy to one person, but you are priceless to another.
16. Great relationships are not governed by one-sided expectations. – When it comes to your relationships, don’t keep everything you need to say to yourself.  Let it out.  Express your point of view.  Communication is not just an important part of a relationship, communication is the relationship.  Communicate even when it’s uncomfortable and uneasy.  One of the best ways to heal and grow a relationship is simply getting everything on the inside out in the open.  Compromise.  That’s how good people make great things happen together.
17. You get to be YOUR best, without competing with everyone else. – When you are happy to simply do your best and not compare or compete, everyone worth your while will respect you.  Here’s some healthy food for thought:  Always… Be strong, but not rude.  Be kind, but not weak.  Be humble, but not timid.  Be proud, but not arrogant.  Be bold, but not a bully.  (Angel and I discuss these concepts in more detail in the “Relationships” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
18. You are not obligated to anyone more so than you are to yourself. – Your relationship with yourself is the closest and most important relationship you will ever have.  So don’t forget about YOU out there, and don’t be too hard on yourself either.  There are plenty of others willing to do both for you.  And remember, if you don’t take good care of yourself, then you can’t take good care of others either; which is why taking care of yourself is the best selfish thing you can do.

The floor is yours…

What’s the best reason you can think of to give up trying to live up to everyone else’s expectations?  Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.

Kisah HATI

KINI 2013 dah munculkan diri.Banyak perit manis yang aku lalui di kala tahun 2012 ,Yang monopous ,yang gila kuasa ,yang kaki kencing ,yang munafik ,yang terlalu angkuh dan lupa diri,yang kaki mengampu ,yang sembang macam sampah,yang setakat pandai bercakap tapi macam bangsat ,yang perangai tak matang.ehhh terasa eh?sorry .tak nak cakap banyak.Penat nak melayan kerenah spesis spesis ni.Aku bukan bongkak,aku cuma mahu luahkan apa yang aku pendam selama setahun .Seperti yang kau orang sedia maklum ,makin berusia kita ,makin banyak pengalaman yang kita akan tempuh .dan sudah pasti korang akan berjumpa juga dengan spesis spesis yang aku gambarkan tadi."The innocent people turn into sluts, best friends turn into enemies, the loser becomes popular, and the trustworthy becomes backstabbing" kadang kadang aku keliru dengan apa yang jadi kat sekeliling aku .Pemikiran sesetengah manusia ni buatkan aku memendam sifat dendam yang sangat kuat ,haha to be honest lah .Perkara macam ni ,dekat mana mana pun boleh jadi .DI ofis ,sekolah ,even masa melepak .Kata orang ,manusia yang kaya ni sangat bongkak ,oke,aku setuju ,tapi bukan semua lah .hanya segelintir sahaja yang berperangai sedemikian.Tapi dorang ni memang ketara ,maksudnya dia ingat dengan duit ,dia boleh beli kawan kawan ,lepas tu memperlekehkan orang ,haha nonsense gila sifat dia.TAPI tulah ,manusia kan .dia tak akan sedar yang tindakan dia tu salah .Sama juga macam kita yang menghisap rokok ,sedangkan hakikatnya rokok itu haram kerana boleh merosakkan diri kita ,umpama MENGHALALKAN BENDE HARAM SECARA SENGAJA.Bercakap tentang respek ,semua orang mahukan diri mereka untuk dihormati,tapi kalau kau orang perhatikan betul betul ,semakin kau cuba untuk tunjukkan sifat hormat korang tu ,semakin dipijak lah kepala korang .heh macam hipotisis sains lak ,but thats the fact .Yang pasti manusia akan berubah ,apabila dah terlalu lama ditindas dan dipijak,apabila mendapat peluang .mereka akan memberontak dan lupa diri .tak percaya?u should trust me.NO BULLSHIT

FOR SAKE OF LOVE

As I was growing up, I thought
There surely are things that'll backfire on me but
I want to live on more tomorrow than I'm doing today
I wonder what people's desires are
We can't understand each other just from words so we get hurt and cry
The more you struggle, the more you'll wander alone
*I'm no longer alone, I'm being changed by my dreams
Even the opposing winds are flying and laughing
Let's become one
Until that moment comes, it will be the proof of my courage
In this world which is constantly changing
It seems there's nothing at all inside reality but
Laughing with you, crying with you, I become myself again
Before I became strong, I kept rejecting encouragement
You watched over me so I could move on
I can see your goal and it's getting crowded
I'm no longer alone, I can have more freedom
I can throw away things like pride and doubts
Having the pleasure of someone by my side
I can finally understand that you must believe in people
Because I met you

Keluh Kerja

Dah nak masuk 2 tahun dah aku kerja dekat sini aku ingatkan makin lama makin mudah ,tapi lain pula jadinya .Betul cakap nenek ,harapkan mendung hingga ke malam ,tiba tiba pulak hujan di tengah hari .Makin lama aku makin give up pulak keje kat tempat ni.Tapi bila pikir balik,sapa nak tanggung makan minom aku?sapa nak setelkan hutang aku semua?aku jugak .so kalau aku give up sekarang ,jahanam terus masa depan aku .Duit duit duit!semua nak kena pakai duit .Takda duit nak jadi apa?jadi sampah jelah jawabnya.Persoalannya sekarang ,sampai bila je aku boleh bertahan?kalau aku berhenti kerja,dapat ke aku cari kerja baru yang tak akan ada masalah?Mana pun aku jejakkan kaki tak semestinya tempat itu tak ada masalah .Susah betul alam pekerjaan ni

Segarkan otak

Bunyinya agak bullshit ,tapi impian aku nak bersantai dekat private island .Salah satunya Pulau Rawa.Nak pergi jauh sangat pun tak boleh jugak sebab bajet tak cukup.Baru baru ni aku pergi pulau Perhentian .Pulau dia cantik sangat tambahan lagi semua hidupan laut boleh nampak dengan jelas .Ciptaan tuhan memang indah .
<http://www.imotan.com/image/tour/pulau-perhentian2_65.jpg>

Lost Hope

Dulu kala ,sebut saja tentang cinta,segalanya indah .Tapi bila mula meningkat dewasa ni ,banyak faktor yang kita patut fikir .Hakikatnya aku bukanlah "somebody".Hanyalah manusia biasa yang bisa mendengar dan belajar daripada pengalaman sahaja.Makin banyak cerita ,makin kelam perasaan aku untuk bercinta.Hakikatnya cinta itu bukanlah sesuatu yang susah untuk dicapai .Cuma masa seruan jiwa saja yang tidak kesampaian lagi .Kalau soul dah mula mati ,sang puteri di depan mata pun takda makna .sangat BULLSHIT!


TUHAN TEMUKAN KITA ,UNTUK MENGAJAR KITA CARA MENGENAL JIWA.UNTUK KITA BELAJAR CARA MENGHARGAI DAN TIDAK BERPUTUS ASA .

Yang berlagak dan berlagak bodoh